Category Archives: Shitty Trail

2284 – The Run that Hardly Happened (foreboding run name)

Hares: Dastardly and On-In
Where: Ogden Boat Launch SE, Calgary, AB
On-In: Ogden Whistle Pub, Calgary, AB
RA: Skewbic Hair
Attendance: 25

This scribe loves it when scribblings write themselves (or, more accurately, when hares post long-winded details about the run on Facebook).

<copy> <paste>

[The Ogden Boat Launch is a] newly improved and otherwise pretty much unused parking area highly suitable for after run refreshments.

The planned run [was said to have] two river crossings, [was going to] 8km long and [promised to go] where no hash trail has gone before. [Hashers – self included – got very excited and did not] want to miss out on the excitement and inherent risks of hashing through virgin territory!

The area was relatively small, so to prevent Frops from blowing through a checkback and finding true trail when they were not supposed to, Monday’s trail [apparently had] no checkbacks. It [was supposed to have] instead six Turkey Checks. These [supposedly had] an arrow pointing in the direction of true trail the pack is expected NOT to follow.

For slower runners these checks also [were rumored to have] a number representing how many hundreds of meters of true trail they [could] cut off. This [was supposed to] cut true trail down from 8 km to 5 km.

There [were] no playgrounds on trail but [we were promised] lots of other interesting things and places to look at and wonder about.

<resume Scribe mode>

OK, so this is what was promised. In hindsight, and reading through the lines, maybe it was clear that trail wasn’t going to be traditional shiggy. Instead, we were given solid pavement pounding (with some gravel and train tracks), detritus, nasty smells and VERY confusing and/or invisible markings.

Still, where the hare spoke the truth is that trail was indeed 8k. A horrible, stinky 8k. 😉 I say this with the utmost respect for Dastardly who normally delivers the BEST, most epic trails. Even Dastardly is allowed the occasional fuck up.

The regroup was back at the parking lot and that is where down downs occurred.

T’was Lazy Cummer (who came late)’s birthday.

On On!
PMS

2182 – The Hare & The Purpose?

Hares : Was there one? Lying Sack of Shit said he was…
Where: Joyce on 4th, Calgary AB
Attendance : 10

S-H-I, T-T-Y, T-R-A-I-L,
Shitty trail, (It sucked!)
Shitty trail, (It really sucked!)
The motherlover set a shitty trail;
I’d rather drink another beer
Than run your shitty trail.
S-H-I, T-T-Y, T-R-A-I-L

I guess that’s what we get for entrusting LSOS to “live hare” at the last minute! No one found trail. Thankfully only ten suckers showed up this week (and that’s including the hare!)

Let that be a lesson for everyone! People better sign up to hare.