2212 – ? Duck You, Covid!

Hares: “Sniffle” and “Fever Cheeks”
Where: Inglewood Parking Lot, Calgary, AB
On-In: The Dirty Duck (the pub formerly known as Swans), Calgary, AB
RA: Hardly
Attendance: 17

One of our hares had a Covid scare over the weekend but tested negative – twice – and proceeded to set her “farewell Covid” trail. Wouldn’t it have been just her luck? Catching Covid on the last days before March 1st (when Covid magically disappears as per Alberta new health regulations)? Wouldn’t it have SUCKED??!

Reports (by the very objective and impartial hares) are that the trail was GREAT, as featured in this photo they took:

The hares had the pack run through a PG so that hashers could play (not with themselves for once).

Front running bastards (and other early finishers) couldn’t wait to get into the beers so Sucks Everything got his “Slim Jim” out (that’s what she said) and broke into Skewb’s car to get to the regroup beer.

Hardly RA’ed and didn’t miss anyone for down downs. Hash Shits exchanged hands and went from Skewbic Hair and Mucky Dip’s pasty paws to Mmmmh Ladyfingers and Camshaft’s bronzed mitts. It serves them right for rubbing their tan lines in everybody’s face…

Mmmmm Ladyfingers can send you pics of her other tan lines if you ask her nicely.

Everybody (who’s anybody) wore their red “Keep Hashing and Carry On On!” shirt (but some like to be different…. AP!).

And then people went to the pub, and there was much rejoicing.

Let’s all sit together and have a chat. What’s the worst that can happen?

Carry ON ON!

2222 – ✌️Two Oh Tutu Oh Two Tutu ✌️- Special Run

Hares: Daisy Deux-ke (what a Cutie Patwotie)
Where: Sandy Beach Park – West Access, Calgary, AB T2T 2V2
On-In: Wild Rose Brewing, Calgary, AB
Attendance: 22 (no it wasn’t, but let’s just say it was)

Looks like someone cooked the books for this run. Run #2222, on 22/2/22?? What a koinkidenk! The hares planned a run of 2.2+km with a start time of 7:22pm.

What wasn’t pre-planned however, is that the temperature at that time proved 2 be a serendipitous -22°C.

People wore their best tutus for the occasion.

On on!

2211 – Family Night *NOT* Family Day

Hares: Abandoned Pussy and Strap On Crampon
Where: Mackenzie Towne Gate & Mackenzie Towne Link, Calgary, AB
On-In: Kilt & Caber Ale House, Calgary, AB
Attendance: 10 (incl. 3 visitors and 1 virgin)

T’was another chilly night in the great white north and only true hashers are committed enough to come out when Weather Canada issues Extreme Cold Warnings.

We had visitors from Canmore, a virgin and wildlife on trail! What else could you ask for?

On On!

2210 – V is for V❤️lentine!

Hares: Scoobie and the Return of the Dastardly
Where: Southland Leisure Centre, Calgary, AB
On-In: Swigs Pub & Grill, Calgary, AB
Attendance: 10?? That’s it?!
RA: Tighty Whitey

Well, well, well. Look what the hare dragged in. If it isn’t Dastardly.

?Guess who’s back, back again? Das’dly’s back, tell a friend ?

It is fitting that these two BFF’s would get bromantic on V-Day and set trail together, with marks as “special” as their special relationship.

Scoob promised a trail “easy to find, hard to follow”, whatever that means. Although Snevil was heard saying: “There were 4 true trail runners, and [the hares] lost us….”.

Supposedly, lots of preparation went into setting this trail: hares went on and on and ooooon about how it took them 2 ½ hours to set.

Attendance was quite low this week, maybe on account of it being Valentine’s Day?? King Shit posited that attendees included a handful of singletons, two hash couples (the Har-ty and the Skew-ky) and people who have been hashing for sooo long that their partners probably kicked them out of the house (King Shit, Snevil and Tighty Whitey).

We did have a couple of bashers: in true royal fashion, Hash-friendly Kim waved at admirers from her balcony. She was happy to join the pack for post run revelries but she won’t expand any energy going from A to B on anything but a bike or skis.

Another basher was Mucky Dip, who ran from her house at the end of down downs.

The paparazzi, waiting for her Royal Highness Kim

In honour of Valentine’s Day, Hardly and Twisty both went down on trail, but not on each other. It is said that everyone went down on this trail… Lucky trail! It was so slippery that it gave some hashers ideas for a new Olympic event.

Tighty Whitey was RA. He says he was “awesome” (his own words). Yet others said that he handled things hard and fast. It’s all a matter of perspective.

On On!

2209 – February Madness

Hares: Booty Camp and Snow Blower
Where: Rotary Park NE, Calgary, AB
On In: Fiddler’s Courtyard, Calgary, AB
Attendance: 18

While some f&^%ers were sucking on piña coladas somewhere hot (and rubbing our faces in it), the rest of us were slumming it, not able to travel anywhere – or worse: self isolating on account of the ‘Vid!

But luckily for us, we have the BootyBlower, the hashing Power couple whose trails always offer us a dream and escape from dreary daily drudgery.

For instance, today’s trail basically took the pack all around Texas… kinda…

They gave us hills and viewpoints.

Who needs “Mehico” when we’ve got such a crew of cool cats right here at home?

Mucky Dip, athlete extraordinaire, unfairly punished for being Front Running Harrierette.