This trail is the event that everyone has been waiting for. Last year, the Itty Bitty Titty Committee went bust, in view of the fact that (t)its membership was 33-66% lower. With PMS gone and Snevil in the UK for long stretches of time, Slippy didn’t have the motivation to set an IBT run by herself. Don’t knock’er though, that would be udderly unfair.
In mammary of good times past, we chose to rack our brains and found the pairfect location for this latest installment of the Itty Bitty Titty Run: Votier’s Flats. This probably was our breast effort to date!
At circle, the pack was fed delicious Fried Egg Gummy candies and enjoyed our cans at the end of the run. Down downs were held outside on the parking lot and after that, hashers went to Local 403 for extra jugs. Luckily, Skewbic Hair didn’t overdo it. Or diddy?
Hares: Hump the Shark and Liquor Lots Where: Liquor Lots’s Loft On In: Born Brewing, Calgary, AB RA: ?? Attendance: 26
First, before we go any further, let’s settle a debate. You may have noticed some discrepant spellings for our new Hash Mattress between the hareline and the scribblings. To be clear, LL herself says that her name is LIQUOR Lots (not Lick’er Lots). Let us not be too literal, King Shit or Skewbie.
For the first time, our new Hash master and mattress came together for their pleasure and ours. In the spirit of pre-Hallowe’en, they took us through or near a total of four cemeteries.
Tonight’s run was proof that hashing just ain’t for everybody. Our virgin vowed never to come back because she “didn’t like it”. Wow, don’t hold back!!
So if you’re thinking about giving hashing a go, you might want to reconsider if: – you don’t drink and are only looking to get in “the orange zone” in between your HIIT and P90X sesh’s. (For us, “the orange zone” is the inside of a bag of Cheezies) – you can’t tolerate profanity and are easily offended – you can’t handle poor singing and loud people
You should consider hashing if: – you don’t take yourself too seriously – you want to get a decent run in (roughly 5-6k). Or not. Whatevz. – your inner child is screaming to be let out – you want to meet some cool people and socialize over beers/drinks.
Hares: Hardly and Twisted Sister Where: The Hares’ House, Beermuda Way NE, Calgary, AB RA: On In Attendance: 27
Hardly and Twisty, on Thanksgiving Day We lift our cups to you and say: We give you thanks for all you’ve done Especially for the gift of run For beauty in nature, which we hashed through For suds and shiggy, and orange food too For being hosts and hares extraordinaire These are the blessings you graciously share. So today we offer this poem of praise And we’ll drink in your honour until we’re in a daze.
Indeed, we have lots to be thankful for: a s.t.u.n.n.i.n.g trail, beautiful weather, a fantastic group of hashers, and a veritable feast.
Everybody loves erections night! Everybody loves Yummy Kippers! In a confluence of all things good, the Hash Gods joined them both in one spectacular night of new mismanagement and goldfish crackers.
Every year, around the 10th of Tishrei, Twisted Sister and Hardly offer us a “Yummy Kippers” Holy Day Run. The celebration includes: · wearing old non-leather shoes (i.e. runners) · pilgrimage through the streets of Calgary · eating (goldfish crackers) and drinking (beer).
Concurrently, new mismanagement was sworn in. Your new mismanagement is:
Hashmaster(s) – Hump the Shark & Liquor Lots Jointmaster – ]Booty Camp Sexitary – King Shit Under The Influencer – Nev-R-bin … RA Coordinator – On-In Haberdasher – Daisy Duke Awardinator – Daisy Duke Beer Meister – Dastardly Beer Wench – Just10Beaver & SnowBlower Hash Cash – Slippy Thong, Hot Cheeks, Mmm… Ladyfingers, Strap-on Übergeek – Nev-R-Bin Üntergeek – Skewbic Hair & Snevil, Sucks Everything, AP, Hardly Hash Horn – Daisy Duke Scribe – Princess Monkey Spanker
On On! PMS
A Drinking Club with a Running Problem — The Calgary Hash House Harriers