Run 2342 – It’s the May Long (Snowstorm)

Hare: Just 10 Beaver

Location: 5308 17 Ave SW, Calgary, AB T3E 6S6

RA:  Hardly
Attendance: 15

Just 10 Beaver Sets and Amazing Trail for the select runners who sacrificed their long weekend to participate!

The Beginning

As typical for the May long weekend, the weather was cold and miserable. Winter running gear and something that doesn’t mind the rain were in order. Putting a run together for the long weekend is always a challenge as folks and travelling and busy. We are thankful for Just 10 Beaver for volunteering to set an epic trail.

The group assembled indoors at the Reagle Beagle on 17 Ave SW. Needed to figure out where to have the down down’s and regroup as they were weather dependent. The group assembled and shared long weekend stories.

Inside it was warm and the patrons were getting ready for some type of hockey game. Something about the Oilers or the Canucks, which was to be decided that evening. As such, there were people there and not necessarily hash friendly for the down downs. As such, decision made….outside down downs in the cold. Outside to get the circle started.

A small but passionate group of 15 souls gathered in the parking lot, getting ready for the big event. Just 10 Beaver was promising some “significant news” or some type. More on that later.

Eventually, PMS stepped up and got the circle started.

Just 10, the hare for the run, went through a long description of how much flagging she had laid on the trail. A harbinger of things to come!

One Thing – Best Trail Ever!

Just 10 pointed to a location where marks might be found and the pack was off!

Snevil noticed the regroup vehicle in the parking lot! A beacon for those on trail to find this vehicle and partake in the wonderment which is available with in.

The Trail

Starting in the neighbourhood, marks were laid out directing the group “over the bridge”, the the wilderness that lurks on the west side of Sarcee Trail. It is amazing how wild the ravine trails can be in an established neighbourhood.

Runners provided evidence of a much better viewing experience than the lazy walkers.


The initial convoluted regroup plan was adjusted to “beer in the parking lot”. As such, the walkers were first to arrive to enjoy the delicious libations, waiting patiently for the runners to appear.

Evidence of the runners finishing.

Down Down’s

Parking lot down downs were in order. Hardly was appointed telepathically by Hump the Shark to do the deed. The pack muddled around. There were a couple of chairs to used as parking lot pylons for the patrons coming and going.

Hardy was in control and dished out the down downs for various and sundry crimes and misgivings. Snevil may or may not have been the choir. A lot was happening and it difficult to keep it straight.

The hare, Just 10 Beaver set an epic trail. She was rewarded with a down down.

The big news that Just 10 wished to share is that we will be calling her Doctor in three years. Great news!

Soon I will be Doctor Just 10 Beaver!

Some of the highlights included the role of Hardly’s Angels. This team ensured that Hardly did not get lost, forgotten, or abducted by aliens.

Apparently Scoobie did something to deserve the hash shit. I believe there was a 330 km three days of cycling in the Rockies on the weekend, and he still made it on time to the hash. Hash Shit for dedication!

A final down down for Hardly for his excellent RA performance.

Down downs done. Time to head inside and cheer on your favourite Canadian hockey team that is still in the play offs. The Oilers defeated that Vancouver team while we were there!

On the piss. Scribed by Skewbic Hair

Trail Summary

A good distance with high quality shiggy and some marks surviving the rain. Great trail!

Run 2341 – Pyro Shows Us the Twins

Hare: Pyro

Location: Crowchild Twin Arena NW, 185 Scenic Acres Dr NW, Calgary, AB T3L 1L4

RA:  Hump the Shark
Attendance: 23

Snow Melting in May – Canada Olympic Park

The Beginning

Pyro volunteered to set trail from the Crowchild Twin Area parking lot in the NW, in the community of Scenic Acres. This part of town has some epic view, pathways that run both downhill and uphill, and well as significant changes in elevation. The ravines are quite spectacular as we have explored them on previous occasions.

The group gathered in the parking lot, and secured appropriate parking spots for the outdoor down-downs that were to follow.

Eventually, something resembling a circle formed as we prepared for the start of the Pyro run.

PMS lead the circle and went through the formalities. Pyro described the run he had set for the group.

The Trail

Pyro pointed us in the direction that lead to the first marks. The pack scattered and started to call out the trail markings. Unfortunately, the trail was configured to start with a huge downhill which had to be repaid later in the trail after exhaustion set in.

Through the neighbourhoods we romped until we discovered more hidden pathways and wide open terrain, with views.

The downhill now changed to uphill and we ambitiously challenged the terrain to finish off the trail. Eventually, the regroup was found and there was much rejoicing.


The support vehicle was full of delicious beverages. A fine finish for a great run.

Down Downs

Outdoor down downs were in order. Those that were prepared with chairs formed a circle. Hump the Shark nominated himself as the Religious Advisor. A choir was selected and the ceremonies were performed.

Hump the Shark called out a number for hashers for various offences and charges. The choir did a fine job of knowing just enough songs to keep it rolling, All was good!

With all the offences dealt with, Hump the Shark declared the group to be “On the piss”.

The group retired to Nottingham’s Pub for further refreshment, popcorn and debrief.

These scribblings scribed by Skewbic Hair

Trail Summary

Depending on your success with check backs, the trail was in the 5 km range. A perfect distance for a hash run.

Note: This map had a section of driving from the end of the run to the pub. You numbers will be different

Run 2340 – Tighty Whitey Birthday Run

Hares:  Tighty Whitey
Location:  Stonyslope Brewing Company

9620 Elbow Dr SW #20, Calgary, AB T2V 1M2

RA:  Hump the Shark
Attendance: 18

Let them eat cake!

The Beginning

Tightey Whitey shared his life changing experience of aging. Crossing the bridge from 59 to 60 is a traumatic experience for some. For others, it is just another number to remember. TW chose to allow us to participate in his week of birthdays by setting a run from the Stonyslope Brewing Company in Haysboro SW. A small craft brewery with an eclectic selection of interesting beers to sample, as well as food.

Normally closed on Monday, they opened up just for us. As such, we had the run of the place which made it easier to misbehave.

The weather was crappy with rain and cold temperatures. As such, it was decided to hold the circle inside for the 18 intrepid hashers in attendance. As the place was all ours for the evening, seemed like a good idea. Our co Hash Master (Mattress) PMS modeled her new shirt prior to calling the circle to order.

Working to get this shirt as a new addition to our Hash Haberdashery. Enough shameless promotion, time to get the circle started.

Our hare, Tightey Whitey was called into the circle to explain the marks for the trail. In the absence of pavement, TW chose to deface a table with the chalk marks. As this was a birthday run, he had selected a unique set of marks to confuse the pack. A “6” was on, “O” was a check, and “5” was a check back.

The insect looking mark was an attempt to explain that he had basically set a loop trail that would be difficult to find and follow. The legs of the insect were all the false trails that TW had set in his mind. The plan was to find the loop, and run as many laps as you pleased to get the distance you were happy with.

With those instructions, the pack was released to the outdoors to find what was left of the marks. Did I mention it had rained all afternoon?

The Trail

First mark was a check. The pack dispersed to find something that looked like true trail. The group fragmented looking for the elusive marks on rain soaked poles and other vertical surfaces.

Who knows where the true trail went, as the fragment I was running with chose to run a loop through Haysboro and eventually run into other fragments who had taken different routes.

Eventually, those lappers did laps until they were satisfied. Others ran in circles until they were done running. With limited marks, it was difficult to solve the run as intended. Eventually, the regroup was located and all was well.


Nothing like a cold beer on a cold night. Other beverage options were available for those that wanted something different.

A short walk from the parking lot to the taproom.


Stonyslope Brewing has an interesting selection of craft beers. Quite a spectrum of colour and taste. The group assembled inside and got sorted.

Down Down’s

Hump the Shark self appointed the Religious Advisor for the evening. He selected a choir of Lying Sack of Shit and Slippy Thong to lead the song singing.

Hump the Shark had much material to work with. The antics of King Shit and PMS were worthy of multiple down-downs. Apparently, KS had the equipment and PMS had the need to get that rubber rat attached to the hash shit appropriately. Zip tie to the rescue.

A notable down-down went to Karate Klit for the El Camino sighting. Guess what song we sang and how many verses?

After enough nonsense, it was time to acknowledge the birthday boy and the hare. All were pleased that the run took place. Those that found the marks enjoyed it even more!

Thinking that he was old, TW was reminded that his numbers are small compared to some of our veteran hashers. On In and Pyro were celebrated for their live experience and wisdom.

You want birthdays? You have a way to go…..

Celebration was in order. Can not say no to cake

Tighty Whitey looking for a secret message in the bottom of the pitcher

But there is more! Gifts and goodies galore! Richard received a thoughtfully wrapped package , much to his delight.

Nice wrapping job. I believe we have KC to thank

TW ripped into things and took out the good stuff to model for the group.

Is that a stain on the cake?

Finally, the festivities came to and end and it was “on the piss”. TW needed to go for a nap as the evening celebrations were quite exhausting for an person of these years.

Scribed by Skewbic Hair

The Trail

Who knows what distance you had. My gadget showed something the in the 5 km range.