Insane Bolt agreed to set trail in the extreme North part of town. For those of in the South, to have a run set “North of Stoney Trail”, is like having to travel large distances to the run start.
Thankfully, Google Maps can tell you how to get there from where you are at.
The start point was found in the Creekside strip mall, which also harbours the Pet Plant store formerly owned by an ancient hasher, Knobby.
A find location to start a run from
Inside the pub the group found some tables set aside for us to congregate.
Getting ready for the run
Camshaft called the group out to form a circle outside. With the weather sill unseasonably warm, most of the ice and snow had been dissipated.
Something like a circleHardlyLiquor Lots and her fur kidHump the SharkXXX Ray and Mmmmm Lady FingersInsane BoltSnow BlowerMr. PeeeeeNutCoq Titty and PMSBooty CampTwistyLazy CummerDastardlyOPP and Just JoshCamshaft and Karate KlitKing Shit
Camshaft ran the circle and went through the announcements and introductions.
Camshaft runs the circle
The hare was called into the circle to explain the marks he has places in this northern neighbourhood for the pack to discover.
Into the circleWe have marks and flaggingUnexplored territoryGood look finding these!
The pack was released into the parkland behind the mall to find the trails and the marks!
The Trail
Off through the parking lot to find the first marks. There were pathways in the dark where marks could be found.
Leaving the mallConfusion on directionApparently this way is goodOff into the neighbourhoodStreets and sidewalksSome trafficOPP makes sure that Josh does not get too lostRavines are a thingThankful we have headlightsOpen fields in the dark!A bit of a viewpointPlayground foundRibbed slide for your pleasureLazy Cummer checking things outReady to roll!More parksLiquor Lots and Poppy ready to slidePosing for a pictureInteresting objectsLazy Cummer with his friendsWe think this is a dogPMS at speedFollowing marksHeadlights This wayFollowing this bunchCertainly it is this way!Neighbourhood explorationRunning in a packCross at the crosswalksAcross the open fieldWalkers in a groupDo you speak this languageInteresting markWalker playtime
After some confusion with the Eagle/Turkey split, parts of the pack managed to find the regroup vehicle and enjoy the adult beverages contained within,
Early arrivers
The runners eventually appeared after their long distance trek to also enjoy refreshments.
Later arrivers
After a fine regroup is was time to go back to the pub to find some food and refreshments.
The group found tables, food and beer and all was good again!
The Down Down’s
The beer was poured in preparation for the closing ceremonies. Camshaft was Religious Advisor for the evening. His long trip away in the warmth had revitalized his has spirit.
Tales and crimes were figured out, and it was time to go.
Special beer for that 500 Run personSmall glasses for small down down’s
The RA was ready and it was showtime!
Camshaft has this one
A choir was selected with Snow Blower and Mmmmmm Lady Fingers engaged to select the songs.
Best choir ever!
Hare – Insane BoltNew Boot – Just JoshBooty CampDastardly
The Onesie of shame was acknowledged and dealt with. XXX Ray did a fine job of wearing the colours!
Well wornNice and warm as well!Shortcutter…Enjoy your Onesie!
OPP recruiting Just Josh!
And now, for the main event, PMS has a milestone acknowledging 500 runs.
I like the feelThat ball in enormous!I got thisVery well done!Mission accomplished RA volunteer for next weekMy job is done! On the piss!
A find job done by Camshaft and we were declared “on the piss”. The group settled into more socializing and refreshment consumption.
Scribed by Skewbic Hair.
Run Summary
A great trail in a new neighbourhood was set by Insane Bolt. Some were able to squeeze 9 km’s out of the trail. The moderate turkeys landed at 5 km+. Who knew we could have such a great run so far north!
As the summer is now done, finding hares for the fall is equally as challenging. With the current mismanagement counting the remaining number of runs they are responsible for setting, Insane Bolt, our illustrious Hashmaster, felt compelled to volunteer to set trail.
Significant in hash numerology, the run was set for September 22 and coincidentally was Run 2422 . You would think that all would have double 22’s present! Sadly, this numbers fact was not adequately communicated to the pack yet 4 intrepid hashers were decked out in their 22 finery.
He selected a new venue in Bowness NW, Brewsmith Brewing Company, as the run start location. With this start point, we had ample new terrain to explore.
A new brew pub in Bowness
The group starting arriving and got set up in the pub prior to the run start. Some of us who were fashionably late, missed this part of the warm up to the run. Nevertheless, we joined the pack as they were relocating to the designated circle up location.
Off the find the circle u p location
PMS identified the centre of the circle, and the pack figured it our from there.
Jell-O shots prior to the circle betting started
A reasonable turnout of 23 hashers in remarkable warm weather was a good sign. Unfortunately, the length of the day is getting shorter. Start in the light, finish in the dark. Headlights are something we need to remember to bring! With the Jell-O shorts completed, it was time to get organized.
Booty CampSnevilLiquor LotsLazy CummerShakesbeerInsane BoltKing ShitPyroInsane BoltPull my Woody and Sticky Lips (and Sacha)XXX RayMucky DipOn InLying Sack of ShitStool Stuffer Snow BlowerTwistyHardly
PMS went through the introductions and announcements. Special run for both Mucky Dip and Hump the Shark. Regular visitors from BC, Pull My Woody and Sticky Lips.
Pinky saluteNobody is paying attention
Eventually, it was time to bring the hares into the circle to describe the marks for tonight’s trail.
We have marksPyro has the big chalkStandard marksThis plus flaggingSmall chalk with Insane Bolt
The marks described, the pack was released to find the marks of the true trail.
The Trail
With the daylight diminishing, the pack headed out along the wide sidewalks of Bowness Road NW.
Pyro points out the wayPack is releasedUrban sidewalk startOff and runningLooking for TrailPMS running steadyLazy Cummer makes a signalIt might be this way?How hard can this be?Big street. Cross it?Shakes beer on the huntLooks like a checkNo place like GnomeGarden party locationGetting darkerLooks like uphill!Can you read the logo?Snevil in the forest. Getting darkerUphillDirt uphillScoobie takes a picture of Canada Olympic ParkScoobie’s picture
After much up and down through the forest trail, we came upon a new neighbourhood with a park! Let the play time begin.
SwingerSliderGravity will deliver meSafely DownSynchronized swingingSnevil has a lookReadyDoneHump the Shark has a plan for this applianceShakesbeer goes upside down!
From the park, it was a series of pathways which lead down toward Canada Olympic Park, including some sunset viewpoints.
Bye Bye sunGoat trailBreaking trail
Up to the top of the hill, we had to navigate through the commercial businesses leading to the true trail.
H with some grafittiPMS lostWhere are the marks!Trail through the bollards
Down the hill and through the streets looking for marks. We knew that we had to get over the tracks to make it back to the pub. This provided a great opportunity for train spotting!
Front of train this wayContainers galoreShipping in action!Many carsSnevil thinkingPatiently waiting for the train to cross
Eventually, the train passes and we looked for marks. We found out that Insane Bolt set this portion of the trail and had many check backs in close proximity to the regroup. False trails near the end are demoralizing.
Finally, the regroup vehicle was spotted and we could celebrate the finish of a fine run.
Regroup is here!OPP and Mucky DipInsane BoltHump the SharkLSOSKing ShitStool StufferShakesbeerXXX RayDastardly
With the regroup done, it was back to the pub to do the down down’s inside.
Getting set up in the pub
The group figured out the beer and food options and awaited for the down down’s to begin.
The Down Down’s
Hump the Shark has finally figured out how to get a volunteer to be the Religious Advisor. In the previous week, he had offered up a “free beer” for a volunteer for next week. Foolishly, Skewbic Hair succumbed to the offer last week and was reminded that he was RA for this week.
With work to do, Skewbic Hair handed off his paparazzi duties to Shakesbeer and got busy with putting together a program.
Skewbic Hair soliciting stories from the pack
Do not let the truth get in the way a good story. A number of offences and crimes were invented and the program was ready. A choir of Sticky Lips and OPP were volunteered and we were ready to go!
Singing the choir a songDown down for the choirHaresFine TrailSnevil upSnevil downRambunctious walkersSwingersDown DownDone!Hardly and XXX Ray – Technology on trailMucky DipKS and Mucky669 Runs!Pull My WoodyLSOS with a hash shitInsane gets a hash shitHump the Shark – 350 runsDown 1Down 2!Various offencesDown Down the RA“On the Piss”
With all the down down’s completed, the pack was declared “on the piss”.
A fine evening with a great trail from a new venue that appears to be Hash friendly!
Scribed by Skewbic Hair
The Trail
A fine effort of something like 8 – 9 kms. New terrain with new challenges. Thanks to Pyro and Insane Bolt for making this happen.
With no hares in the program, being a Hashmaster can have it’s challenges. As such, Insane Bolt was coerced into setting trail. His plan was to make it a long one, with words like Ultra Marathon used to describe his intentions.
Weather can be a fickle thing in Calgary. Last weeks heat wave was soon forgotten as the polar vortex settled in for some time, Running in temperatures of -25C requires some special provisions. Layers and dry clothes to change into are a must.
The temperatures filtered out some of the fair weather types, so our numbers were a bit down this week. It is not the quantity of the group, but the quality. As such we had 11 hard core hashers present to enjoy the run that Insane Bolt had produced for us!
Through the ice fog, snow and slippery roads, the group assembled at Pazzer’s Saskatchewan Pub. For those that are not familiar, this pub is a bastion of all things Saskatchewan. Like an oasis for those that long for a touch of Regina in Calgary.
Inside was busy, cramped but warm as we got ready for the run.
With all the late cummers accounted for, it was time to head out and circle up.
Sort of a circle
Hump and StoolieLiquor LotsLazy Cummer and King ShitInsane Bolt and Snow BlowerKarate KlitPrincess Monkey SpankerScoobie with full cold weather kit
PMS conducted the circle and our hare, Insane Bolt, was summoned into the circle to describe what he had planned for us.
Marks are drawnCold weather chalkFlagging
Insane pointed a direction and the cold hashers started to look for marks.
The Trail
Through the community of Montgomery, we found marks and followed them. Surprisingly, there are hills in the neighbourhood, with most of them going up!
Off we goReturning from a check packCheck from hereArt as windows
We stopped at the viewpoint for those in our group, and a picture was taken to record the event.
You can see a lot from here!
Apparently, the other half of the running group was elsewhere, having been befuddled by the interpretations of the marks. Eventually, they were found and no one died. They did send us some pictures to prove they were on trail!
Off through the wonders of Bowness and the bridge crossings along the Trans Canada highway, always a good time!
Down the hillCrunchy snow and crisp airBowness bridgeHashers along the bridge
Off toward Shouldice Park and a run through the pathways by the river. It was cold. Eventually, we ended up at the regroup to enjoy beer slushy’s. We were somewhat concerned about the missing hashers, but they eventually made it to the end and all was good!
Regroup for the first waveStylish moistureLL with the frosty lookLC thinking warm thoughtsKS keeping us safeRegroup wave 2KK with the frosty look!
PMS survived…..
With outdoor refreshments done, it was time to dress for inside down down’s. Dump the wet clothing and ward off hypothermia.
Off to the inside where we packed the pub with a full table of happy hashers. The locals were amused with the invasion.
Settling inLL sporting the Onesie of ShamePMS radiating
It was decided to splash out for suitable down down beer, the honour and recognize the intrepid group that enabled the continued operation of the group!
Beer Wench provided a full serve!
Hump the Shark declared “sitting down down’s” and we were set to go.
Choir was Scoobie and Lazy Cummer and the program was started.
Hump the Shark thinks someone is number 1Choir reward!
Around the table we went with down down’s for everyone!
Insane Bolt – Great TrailStool Stuffer – off to Mexico shortlyKC did not get lost!Snow Blower – Extra check backsShakes Beer – Is alive and coming out to the HashPMS demonstrating proper techniqueLiquor Lots – Happy to be inside!
After we exhausted the stories and the crimes, the Religious Advisor declared the group to be “on the piss”. The group settled in for more socializing and refreshment prior to heading out into the cold.
On the Piss!Drink amongst yourselves
Scribed by Skewbic Hair.
Trail Summary
We run over 5 kms is the cold. There were shortcuts available for those that needed them. In addition, Insane Bolt had some extra distance for those so inclined. A great run in the cold.
As St. Patrick’s day is a tribute to all things Irish, it was only appropriate to theme the run around this day, even though we were one day off. As a consequence, the pub was low on beer stocks as the revelers had been very busy clearing them out of beer.
Insane Bolt stepped up to hare this trail, and the Hash is thankful that we get to run in the posh NW quadrant and take in two Irish pubs! The weather was unseasonably warm, and shorts were observed on some of the hashers.
We started at the Jameson pub, Busy with people, but they had a couple of tables for us. We even had a visitor (Trump something from Utah) and a new boot (Amy). Good turn out!
The circle formed in the parking lot and things got rolling with On-In leading the circle.
Insane Bolt was called in to describe the madness he had planned for us. Both a runners and a walkers trail planned.
The Run
We were directed to find the marks and pointed a direction. The pack dispersed and the run was afoot. Something in the 6 km range was planned
The Regroup
Thankfully, a regroup appeared just when needed. These was much social interaction and beer drinking here.
The On-In
We took over a section o the Kilkenny Irish Pub prior to the commencement of the down-downs. A big group with not a lot of seating. We all jammed in and it was good!
The Down Down’s
Roaring Nancy was the Religious Advisor who looked after the down-downs. He called for a choir of Dastardly, Hardly and Skewbic Hair to supply him with suitable songs for his long list of crimes.
All was well, and the hares, new boots, visitors and other offenders were called up to be recognized.
Pictures were a bit light as the photo guy was stuck in the choir.
On the piss!
Scribed by Skewbic Hair
A Drinking Club with a Running Problem — The Calgary Hash House Harriers
