Run 2340 – Tighty Whitey Birthday Run

Hares:  Tighty Whitey
Location:  Stonyslope Brewing Company

9620 Elbow Dr SW #20, Calgary, AB T2V 1M2

RA:  Hump the Shark
Attendance: 18

Let them eat cake!

The Beginning

Tightey Whitey shared his life changing experience of aging. Crossing the bridge from 59 to 60 is a traumatic experience for some. For others, it is just another number to remember. TW chose to allow us to participate in his week of birthdays by setting a run from the Stonyslope Brewing Company in Haysboro SW. A small craft brewery with an eclectic selection of interesting beers to sample, as well as food.

Normally closed on Monday, they opened up just for us. As such, we had the run of the place which made it easier to misbehave.

The weather was crappy with rain and cold temperatures. As such, it was decided to hold the circle inside for the 18 intrepid hashers in attendance. As the place was all ours for the evening, seemed like a good idea. Our co Hash Master (Mattress) PMS modeled her new shirt prior to calling the circle to order.

Working to get this shirt as a new addition to our Hash Haberdashery. Enough shameless promotion, time to get the circle started.

Our hare, Tightey Whitey was called into the circle to explain the marks for the trail. In the absence of pavement, TW chose to deface a table with the chalk marks. As this was a birthday run, he had selected a unique set of marks to confuse the pack. A “6” was on, “O” was a check, and “5” was a check back.

The insect looking mark was an attempt to explain that he had basically set a loop trail that would be difficult to find and follow. The legs of the insect were all the false trails that TW had set in his mind. The plan was to find the loop, and run as many laps as you pleased to get the distance you were happy with.

With those instructions, the pack was released to the outdoors to find what was left of the marks. Did I mention it had rained all afternoon?

The Trail

First mark was a check. The pack dispersed to find something that looked like true trail. The group fragmented looking for the elusive marks on rain soaked poles and other vertical surfaces.

Who knows where the true trail went, as the fragment I was running with chose to run a loop through Haysboro and eventually run into other fragments who had taken different routes.

Eventually, those lappers did laps until they were satisfied. Others ran in circles until they were done running. With limited marks, it was difficult to solve the run as intended. Eventually, the regroup was located and all was well.


Nothing like a cold beer on a cold night. Other beverage options were available for those that wanted something different.

A short walk from the parking lot to the taproom.


Stonyslope Brewing has an interesting selection of craft beers. Quite a spectrum of colour and taste. The group assembled inside and got sorted.

Down Down’s

Hump the Shark self appointed the Religious Advisor for the evening. He selected a choir of Lying Sack of Shit and Slippy Thong to lead the song singing.

Hump the Shark had much material to work with. The antics of King Shit and PMS were worthy of multiple down-downs. Apparently, KS had the equipment and PMS had the need to get that rubber rat attached to the hash shit appropriately. Zip tie to the rescue.

A notable down-down went to Karate Klit for the El Camino sighting. Guess what song we sang and how many verses?

After enough nonsense, it was time to acknowledge the birthday boy and the hare. All were pleased that the run took place. Those that found the marks enjoyed it even more!

Thinking that he was old, TW was reminded that his numbers are small compared to some of our veteran hashers. On In and Pyro were celebrated for their live experience and wisdom.

You want birthdays? You have a way to go…..

Celebration was in order. Can not say no to cake

Tighty Whitey looking for a secret message in the bottom of the pitcher

But there is more! Gifts and goodies galore! Richard received a thoughtfully wrapped package , much to his delight.

Nice wrapping job. I believe we have KC to thank

TW ripped into things and took out the good stuff to model for the group.

Is that a stain on the cake?

Finally, the festivities came to and end and it was “on the piss”. TW needed to go for a nap as the evening celebrations were quite exhausting for an person of these years.

Scribed by Skewbic Hair

The Trail

Who knows what distance you had. My gadget showed something the in the 5 km range.